Top Ten Things I Would Rather Do Than Run

10.  I would rather eat 30 boxes of ho-hos (mmmmmm......ho-hos) in a 5 minute time limit.

9.  I would rather have a show called "Mike and Jen Plus Ten."  Heck, 11, 12, 13, 14 ,15............

8.  I would rather have bamboo shoots shoved under my fingernails (I do need a manicure).

7.  I would rather be doused in petroleum and set aflame.

6.  I would rather someone cut slits all over my body with a rusted razor blade and soaked in a bath full of rubbing alcohol (what's another tattoo or two).

5.  I would rather jump off a 50 foot cliff with a 55 foot bungee cord wrapped around my ankle (that might leave a mark).

4.  I would rather give a speech on the technical comprehension of chemical disruption of the DeLorean to the 3rd power over the letter Z minus 0 given a flux capacitor and a safety pin wearing a pink tu-tu and sporting a "GI JANE" hair-do. 

3. I would rather jump from a C-17 in the middle of Korowai tribe in Papua, Indonesia.  Strapped to my front is a sign that says "long lost tribe member" and on the back it says "I'm a witch."

2. I would rather have my husband give me papercuts for as many times as I have had him stop and get me a cup of joe (BTW...that's a lot).

1. I WOULD RATHER BE THROWN IN A POOL OF FREAKING SHARKS WITH FREAKING LASERS ON THEIR HEAD.